Marriage Rites : Pujya Gurudev

Pujya Gurudev Pt. ShriRam Sharma;s Kripa

Strange and Peculiar Marriage Rites

(Akhand Jyoti,Nov.Dec.2005)

The institution of marriage forms the nucleus of social order. All social customs, rituals, and conventions are built around it. Different types of marriage practices are prevalent in different parts of our country. In other countries of the world, too, many novel marriage customs exist, still surviving in one form or the other, among other aborigines and tribes. Many of these practices are really very interesting and unique. These marriages take different names and forms in different parts of our country: for example, birhare and paithu in Bihar, golag-dhero among Gujarati Bhils, ghotul in the sonds of Bastar and so on. In the paithu custom, the position of girls is dominant; they forcibly start residing, even before marriage, in the house of whichever boy they like. 

Marriage follows later. In the golag-dhero practice of Gujarat a swayamvar is organized on holi. Some gur and coconut is tied to the top of a pole. Around this pole dance all the women and girls of the village forming a circle and the men folk, too, in an outer circle. In this competition, winner is the man who is able to break through the inner cordon of women and take out the gur and coconut. He gets the privilege of choosing any of the women present as his wife. But to reach the pole is a tough job. 

The women do everything possible to foil him. Beating with brooms, pulling hair, throwing stones, even biting  all are resorted to. In the Motia tribe of north Garhwal and Kumaon districts boys have full freedom to select their life partner. When the barat reaches the brides place the groom attempts to take away the bride in a doli (palanquin) even before performing any rite. There ensues a mock fight between the two sides. 

The brides side is defeated and bidai (farewell to the bride) takes place. After a week or so, the two sides reach a compromise, which is followed by a feast and singing and dancing. In the districts of Mymensinh, Gwalpara and Kamrup of Bengal and Assam the goro tribals are known as head  hunters. Theirs is a matrilineal system. 

The search for a groom ends in selection of the boy whose garland has the maximum number of skulls and who gives the most ferocious look. In the Khas tribe of Jaunsar Bawar of western U. P., the marriage rites in themselves are not as strange as their beliefs. The most unusual feature is the existence of polyandry. 
After the marriage of one brother, his wife is deemed to be the wife of other brothers, too. This system is called Draupadi  Vivah. Draupadi is worshipped as a deity by the women here. The marriage is celebrated by free flow of liquor and other intoxicants. Matching horoscopes is a common practice in Hindu families. But the custom takes a very odd form in the Khog community residing in Northeast frontier areas of our country. In this community, the grooms father searches for a bride. After the marriage has been fixed the groom and brides sides arrive with a cock and hen respectively before a gathering of the elders and other respected members of the community. The priest cuts the tongues of the two birds and tallies them. If the signs match, the marriage is considered auspicious and is approved. Other rites are in the community tradition.

Thanks GOD, Thanks Sadguru,

Shiv Sharma